By David • Updated: January 21, 2025
Golden Retrievers are often seen as the perfect family dog: gentle, goofy, loyal, and always up for a game of fetch. But don’t let those sweet eyes and golden locks fool you—they’re not exactly low-maintenance pets. In fact, do the wrong thing with your Golden, and you may end up with a shredded couch, a flooded living room, or a fur-covered disaster zone.
Whether you’re a new dog parent or a seasoned Golden lover, here are 8 things you should absolutely avoid doing—unless you’re looking for pure canine chaos.
⚠️ 1. Leaving Them Alone With Food (a.k.a. Your Kitchen Bandit)
Golden Retrievers have stomachs like bottomless pits and the curiosity of toddlers. If it looks edible—or even kind of edible—they’ll eat it. Leftovers on the counter? Gone. Bread in a bag? Shredded. Trash can? An all-you-can-eat buffet.
💡 Real Talk: One Golden owner left a sandwich unattended on the coffee table for 90 seconds. When she came back, all that remained was a single piece of lettuce… and a guilty face.
Pro Tips:
- Store food in high cabinets or airtight containers.
- Invest in a dog-proof trash can with a secure lid like the iTouchless Motion-Sensor Trash Can to avoid messy mishaps.
- Teach “Leave it” and “Off” commands early—it might just save your dinner.
🏃♂️ 2. Skipping Daily Exercise (Unless You Like Torn Shoes)
Golden Retrievers are born athletes. Miss their daily exercise, and they’ll turn your home into a jungle gym—your shoes, remote, and throw pillows will be the casualties.
Signs of a Bored Golden:
- Digging holes in your backyard
- Chewing furniture or clothing
- Zoomies at 2 a.m.
- Barking at literally nothing
Golden Rule: Aim for 60–90 minutes of exercise daily—walks, fetch, hiking, swimming, or even doggy treadmill time if you’re short on outdoor options.
🐾 Try This: Puzzle feeders like the Outward Hound Hide N’ Slide are great for mental stimulation and energy burning on rainy days.
💦 3. Underestimating Their Love for Water
Golden Retrievers were originally bred for retrieving game from water—and that love hasn’t faded. Whether it’s a muddy puddle, lake, sprinkler, or your freshly cleaned bathtub, they’re diving in.
🌧️ Walk them on a rainy day? Say goodbye to clean floors.
Golden-Proofing Tips:
- Always supervise near pools or open water—yes, they can swim, but accidents happen.
- Keep a dog towel or absorbent mat near the door.
- Use water-resistant covers on car seats and furniture.
🛁 Expert Tip: Regular bathing (every 4–6 weeks) helps manage that “wet dog” smell, especially after water play.
🐶 4. Expecting a Quiet Companion
If you thought Golden Retrievers were silent angels, think again. They bark, whine, groan, and even “talk” in hilarious ways. While they’re not yappy like some small breeds, they’re definitely vocal communicators.
They’ll ‘speak’ when:
- They’re bored or lonely
- They see another dog, cat, squirrel, or leaf
- You’re taking too long to hand over the treat
Training Tip: Use commands like “Quiet” or “Enough,” but don’t punish them for expressing themselves. Their chattiness is part of their charm.
✂️ 5. Neglecting Grooming (Unless You Want a Fur Blizzard)
Golden Retrievers shed. A lot. Skip grooming and you’ll be swimming in fur balls and mats. Plus, poor coat maintenance can lead to skin infections and discomfort.
Basic Grooming Schedule:
- Brushing: 2–3 times per week (daily during shedding season)
- Bathing: Every 4–6 weeks
- Nail trims: Every 3–4 weeks
- Ear cleaning: Weekly
🧼 Tool to Try: The Pecute Self-Cleaning Slicker Brush is great for thick coats and minimizes mess.
🕒 6. Leaving Them Alone Too Long
Golden Retrievers are deeply social dogs. They crave companionship and can suffer from separation anxiety if left alone for more than a few hours.
When left alone too long:
- They may chew walls, doors, or shoes
- Potty accidents can happen—even in trained dogs
- They may howl, whine, or bark nonstop
Solutions:
- Hire a dog walker or try doggy daycare for long days
- Use calming toys or white-noise machines
- Consider crate training for short periods
⚙️ 7. Thinking They’re Low-Maintenance
They’re friendly and obedient-looking, so people assume Golden Retrievers are easy. Reality check: They’re emotional, energetic, and endlessly curious. That combo takes real effort.
✋ Common Myth: “They’re so sweet, they don’t need training.”
Nope. A bored, untrained Golden is a 70-lb tornado.
Golden Owner Checklist:
- Daily walks and mental games
- Early socialization and consistent training
- Lots of love and presence
📚 Resource: Consider enrolling in basic obedience or canine enrichment classes—they thrive on learning and attention.
🧠 8. Underestimating Their Intelligence (They’ll Outsmart You)
Golden Retrievers are scary smart. We’re talking “figure out how to open child-proof latches” smart. If you’re not giving them puzzles, training, and mental challenges, they’ll invent their own “games”—and they won’t be the kind you like.
Their Favorite Tricks:
- Opening doors or drawers
- Stealing laundry for fun
- Pretending they “forgot” commands to see if they can get away with it
Mental Workout Ideas:
- Treat puzzles
- Scent games
- New trick training
- Hide-and-seek (yes, seriously—they love it!)
🔍 Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Q: Are Golden Retrievers good with kids?
A: Absolutely! They’re gentle, playful, and incredibly patient. Just supervise interactions with toddlers, as big pups can accidentally knock them over.
Q: Do they shed year-round?
A: Yes. Especially in spring and fall, but you’ll see fur year-round. Get a quality vacuum and brush often.
Q: Can they live in apartments?
A: They can, but it takes commitment. Plenty of daily exercise and outside time is a must. Apartment dwellers should prepare for more indoor activity management.
Q: What’s their average lifespan?
A: Most Golden Retrievers live 10–12 years, but with excellent care, some reach 13–14.
🎯 Final Thoughts
Golden Retrievers are the heart-stealing, tail-wagging best friends we all dream of—but only if you’re ready for the reality behind the fluff. They’re high-energy, emotionally sensitive, hilariously messy, and endlessly loyal.
If you’re prepared to meet their needs—physically, mentally, and emotionally—you’ll have a companion who’ll love you with every fiber of their golden being (even if it means shedding some of it on your couch).
So go give your Golden a belly rub… and maybe hide the bread first.
